Quotations: Volume 8

Here are some of the educational, inspirational, and humorous quotations from my classes this week:


Acting Professor: What are you doing in here?
Big Show: We're playing dodge-ball. Everyone against [O.D.].

Acting Professor: Okay. What's next?
Big Show: Well, first you're gonna give me a back rub. Then you're gonna get me a drink. Then we'll talk business in about five minutes.

"I felt that [O.D.] was a special boy at that point." - Iceman

"He has no invention. He's just got this screen that goes up and down. But he knows that he's going to invent something fabulous. Which is like me becoming a rock star." - Analysis Professor

Voice Professor: Find yourselves lying down.
Iceman: Found it.
Voice Professor: You're ahead of the game.

"This is not a talent; it's a skill-set." - Voice Professor

"[Student] is suffocating to death!" - The Pro
(Another person is going to be added to our class in December. Sometimes when we do exercises, we mentally include her to the idea of our ensemble. In this exercise, we ended up in a huge full-class pile-up at one point.)

(When O.D. was late to class, we tried to "radiate" towards him to signal him to arrive)
Acting Professor: We need to work on our radiating. [O.D.] is not here.
Me: Maybe he got molded into something and can't get out.
Acting Professor: *snort*

"Testitude?" - Iceman (misunderstanding "Test etude")

"I'm going to name my first child 'Zuh-zhuh-ruh'." - Me, after a Voice exercise

"Conscious incompetence is a very painful place to be living." - Voice Professor

(regarding a stuffed animal named Musky that Two-Shots-Up and O.D. are obsessed with)
Big Show: I'm gonna get rid of that damn thing forever.
Two-Shots-Up: Don't you dare.
Big Show: I'm gonna teach you about loss.

"You haven't gotten paid yet? God, dude, take my nuts." - The Pro to Iceman, offering him a jar of mixed nuts

"[O.D.] is like an impulse. If you try to hold him, he dies." - The Pro, after O.D. disappeared from the classroom

"Sometimes our problem is that we are waiting to be electrocuted by an impulse, and we end up missing one that is incredibly subtle." - Acting Professor

"That curséd control. Who needs it? We have so much of it that it would help if we could just get rid of some of it." - Acting Professor

"When you have the impulse, you have to give yourself a little tap on the butt." - Acting Professor

"Time flies when you're kickin' ass." - Iceman, after Big Show commented that 30 minutes had gone by between the time an etude started and the discussion on it ended

"You have to record before you delete." - Acting Professor

"That is not a polo shirt, [Analysis Professor]. We have a problem here." - Thrill

"Let's pretend, God forbid, you're all directors." - Analysis Professor

Killer: I guess I need to do some tongue exercises.
Wifey: Just make out with tons of people.

(in an etude, where Iceman put Killer on his shoulders so they could escape through a skylight)
Killer: I don't think this is gonna go well.
Iceman: This is not gonna go well.

"I think it's a paper door." - Movement Professor

(about an etude)
All-The-Way: Do I love him? I don't know.
Acting Professor: How very much like life.

"Freedom is not analogous to flow." - Movement Professor

"There is no such thing as overestimating the beginning." - Acting Professor

"We don't know where we are until we push this nutshell." - O.D.

"The best way to prepare for a performance is to eliminate social b***s*** and become a monk for a day." - Acting Professor