Quotations: Volume 38

Here are some of the educational, inspirational, and humorous quotations from my classes this week:

(Disclaimer: quotations are often taken out of context and may not accurately reflect the way they were originally intended)


Voice Professor: Let's not pretend. This test is not going to be Friday.
D-Train: (laughs) Let's not pretend. (laughs)
Voice Professor: Well, we've all been pretending that this test was going to be Friday. I've been pretending and believing it. And it seems I was the only one who didn't know over the weekend.

"If you make a mistake, you have to follow through on it. If you take a step on stage, you can't go, 'Oops! I'm not supposed to be there.' If you do, it's Miss Canterowski's third grade pageant, and I don't want my name on it."
- Head of Program

"You can all do this... Oh my God, I just reminded myself of Tim Gunn. (beat) Actually, yes. Make it work!"
- Head of Program

"You are a cog. A cog without which the play cannot work, but you are nonetheless a cog."
- Head of Program

(Acting Professoressa puts down her mug after taking a drink of her sparkling fruit-flavored water and makes eye contact with D-Train)
Acting Professoressa: There is not gin in here.
D-Train: I just thought it was funny the way you put that mug down.
Acting Professoressa: (picks up mug, takes a swig, and feigns drunkenness) Break your sonnet into beats. (winks obviously at D-Train) Three quatrains... and a couplet.

(in a discussion about how literal actions, or "doings", are different than sensual ones, Acting Professoressa suggests that "to lick" would be a good example of a sensual doing.)
Iceman: So, my doing is to lick you?
Acting Professoressa: I'd like you to metaphorically lick with those very words.
Jceman: Um, okay...
O.D.: (to Iceman) Don't worry, man. I won't tell [your wife].
Acting Professoressa: Would you like me to do it for you?
Iceman: Um, okay...
Acting Professoressa: (using "to lick") What was... What was the question?

"You want the meter to inform the poem, but the meter doesn't run the poem."
- Acting Professoressa

"Smile! If you're going to kill someone, you should enjoy it!"
- Movement Professor, while we were working on a step in ballet that she said should be done with enough force that it could kill someone

Thrill: [Acting Professoressa], you're not going green, are you?
Acting Professoressa: Going green?
Thrill: Saving trees?
Acting Professoressa: Oh. I thought you were referring to my complexion.

(D-Train told All-The-Way that while he was on a break from Acting class, 1st-Year Acting Professor had said that D-Train should burst into the middle of his class and ambush the 1st-years while they were doing an etude)
All-The-Way: Was he serious, or was he joking?
D-Train: I don't know. He's Russian.

Acting Professoressa: Okay, who wants to start?
O.D.: (muffled, as his mouth was full) I'll start!
Acting Professoressa: You've got a mouth full of apple. [All-The-Way] will start.

"There's no personification there. 'Sea' is the same as 'toilet'. It's just a noun."
- Acting Professoressa, when someone asked if a line of Shakespearean text involving "the raging sea" was personification