Quotations: Volume 3

Here are some of the educational, inspirational, and humorous quotations from my classes this week:

Voice Professor: Some days it gets so cold in here, it's, like, ridic.
The Pro: I thought she said that it gets so cold, you'll lose your dick.

"Realize what was yesterday, what is today, and, most importantly, what is tomorrow?" - Acting Professor

"So you want me to write a paper, right?" - Thrill, when our Analysis Professor asked if there were any questions about what he wanted us to do, concerning the paper due Tuesday.

"If the playwright is on stage, then something's wrong." - Analysis Professor

"I'm sorry, I have no sense of humor in the morning. I start making jokes later in the day, but they're terrible. Like... *pause* I can't even think of one." - Movement Professor, after not understanding a joke that The Pro made.

"Sometimes it's like, 'I'm tremoring, tremoring... oh yeah...'" - Voice Professor

"I found it! I got it up, and now I don't want to let it down. I'm a palm-to-palm man!" - The Pro, exclaiming that he finally found a strong tremor, and that it was in the palm-to-palm position

"You're in my league. I watch a lot of really questionable television." - Voice Professor

"Are you aware of your edge towards cynicism?" - Voice Professor to Big Show

"We all know we're lying when we say there are no stupid questions, don't we?" - Voice Professor

"It's not about how long you do these technique exercises; it's about how often." - Acting Professor

Acting Professor: So, [All The Way], you've rehearsed in one space, and then you've entered a new space to perform. What do you do?
All The Way: Well... You're supposed to adjust...
(after being thrown by a new space)

"You wanna see my powdered doughnuts?" - The Pro

*in an improvisation-based exercise, they turn on an imaginary tv*
Wifey: I Love Lucy?
O.D.: Yeah... Do you? Love Lucy?
Wifey: I think I do.

"Musky is mine!" - O.D. (in an etude)

"I have a strong urge to figure out what's going on... even if there's absolutely nothing going on." - O.D.

Me: [Analysis Professor], are you coming to our acting class tomorrow?
Analysis Professor: I am. So don't f*** up.
Me: But [Movement Professor] says that success doesn't exist without failure.
D-Train: She only says that to untalented people.

"No one has sex. No one gets off. I would suggest that that's the driving force behind every Feydeau play... No one has an orgasm." - Analysis Professor

"[Analysis Professor] said something the other day, and I said, 'You need to tremor more.'" - Voice Professor

"You can get these at a store called Elysian Fields. But don't ever go there with [Analysis Professor]. He can last about two and a half minutes. As soon as you hit the section of crystals, it's all over for him." - Voice Professor

"We happened to be out running errands, and I wanted to go there. Why should it be all about him?" - Voice Professor, explaining why she took Analysis Professor to Elysian Fields

"I feel like such a girly man in my arms." - The Pro

"You've never seen a tv made into a fishbowl before? Well, get out more." - Iceman

*when we were asking questions of the person who had just completed an exercise*
Thrill: (to Acting Professor) My question is for you.
Acting Professor: How do I know?
Thrill: Because I'm telling you it's for you.

*after The Pro was handling an umbrella as though it were a prop gun for color guard*
Big Show: How did you know how to do that? I thought you were in the Marines for a minute there.
The Pro: Marines? Please! I was in Funny Girl.

Acting Professor: (explaining an imagination exercise) This is an electric chair.
Big Show: For home or personal use?

*after Iceman justified being by an electric chair by saying he had been on a tour and strayed from the group*
Acting Professor: Why were you by Queen Elizabeth's throne?
Iceman: I was on two tours today.
Wifey: You're a bad tourist.
Iceman: I know. There's a 'do not touch' sign, and... *he leans out to touch the chair*

"Sorry. I was about to go right into criticism." - O.D. (all our responses to other people's exercises are supposed to being with the positive, and then move into criticism)